Tuesday, June 12, 2007

What's white and giggles?

A tickled onion! Tee hee…totally the type of rubbish joke that I find very amusing…Peeg, you are a genius for telling me that one. I just don't understand why it's been received with groans from the people I've passed it on to. And there have been two separate people who have responded with the answer "You". Well, I suppose this is also valid.

This is the blog which should really have preceded the Big Brother stuff…but I am laaaaaaaazzzzzzzzy! It's another one of my hotch-potch nothingness blogs me sweets.

A lot of this will be about (live) music…there seem to be so many great gigs on in Newcastle lately :o)

Ok, so onto gigs that I have attended (recently)…

The first of the batch was Patti Smith at the Sage. I went to it with me dad…how rockin' am I?! I was panicking about my dad coming up to stay…he has not seen the inside of my house since he helped me move in…and I am not exactly known for being tidy. In usual Divinyl fashion, like every essay or revision deadline I ever had as a student, I completely avoided the tidying thing until the very last minute…but, fortunately (and with lots of advance warnings that it was worse than it actually was) I managed to pull it off. And it was a rather nice 'weekend' actually ('weekend' with inverted commas either side of it because it actually occurred over a Wednesday and Thursday night…I took the Thursday off work as Annual Leave). My dad now knows I smoke!!! This is massive. And I am 27! He sussed me…I went for a cig in the pub we went to after the gig and he smelt it on me when I came back…oops! Anyway, it was a slightly under the influence (and much mellower since he has been off work sick long-term) dad who caught me out, so it all turned out ok. I still didn't smoke in front of him the whole time he was here though.

Anyhoo…Ms Smith. Was excellent. A real crowd-rouser. It was one of those gigs that, had it been the 60s and the audience collectively on mind-altering substances, would have been described as 'seminal' (in the 'massively influential and noteworthy' sense, as opposed to something to do with fluids...yuck!) in the annals of time. Even without said substances it was still jolly good. The cover of Neil Young's 'Helpless' that she closed with was particularly enjoyable. My dad, who (despite being very into all sorts of music) has never been into Patti Smith, came away a total fan, vowing to purchase the latest album, which he had said he's only seen rubbish reviews of, and saying that it was up there in the top three gigs he has ever seen (he is 60 and has been to rather a lot of gigs).

Two days later (after, on the intermediate evening, introducing papa to Revolution's take on the Bloody Mary and Tokyo's Chilli Mojitos…and the Bacchus to round it off with some Landlord…pure class us like!) it was back to the Sage to catch Bat For Lashes and Joan As Police Woman. I enjoyed both very much, although Joan had decided to perform with just her and a piano on stage and I think I would have enjoyed her with a band more. Seemed like a jolly nice woman though, and she had a very nice nose. Bat For Lashes were suitably crazy and off-the-wall, as expected. And, due to them, I now realise that I want to play the dulcimer...or at least that I think the dulcimer is cool (Anthony had to name what it was for me though).

The following day I was invited along to go and see Eliza Gilkyson at the Cluny. I haven't heard anything of hers beyond her name before. I think I would probably describe it as country-tinged folk. I enjoyed the gig, but don't think I need to be traipsing out to get hold of her entire back catalogue. I may be a philostine, but I have never heard of her father, Terry Gilkyson…apparently he wrote the song 'Bare Necessities'. This is a tune with which I am most familiar, having made up an 'alternative lyrics' version about a boy I knew when I was 15 (those lyrics weren't very complimentary, but not because I personally knew him 'in that sense'…it was mostly about the fact that lots of other girls did).

I missed the Freevolution festival at the Quayside on Bank Holiday Monday as my pal that I'd arranged to go with couldn't come along…twas a shame, but I wasn't too gutted, as there was only Datarock that I was really keen on checking out. And the weather was pretty rotten…whereas previous years I have managed to get some colour to my skin while I load myself with free cider (I don't even like cider but, hey, when it's free!). This global warming business is obviously not all it's cracked up to be ;o) I do hope it's nicer for the Americana wotsit in July…

…at which Holly Golightly will be playing…the second time I will have been able to catch her for free. And she was great last time…I even jiggled a little bit! As part of that I will also be seeing (although paying to go and see) Nanci Griffith and Laura Veirs (the latter being supported by people I know…how ace is that?!).

I've also been rounding a crowd up to go and see Ruthie Foster at the Cluny. She's not someone I know a great deal about, but the stuff on her MySpace page sounds good…kind of bluesy-soulish. I do like to give new things a whirl!

But the gig that I am MOST excited about (and have to wait until July for!) is Sunny Sweeney. She is a great country singer…and I mean C-O-U-N-T-R-Y! I bought her album on the 'net' from America before it was available in the UK, so have been listening to her for some time now, and I'm stoked that she's coming to Newcastle. This is a woman who, only one album in, has already played the Opry! She has also turned me into a petty criminal; I half-inched a poster, which was advertising her upcoming show, from The Cluny. Don't worry Sunny, there was more than one, I'm not going to be denting your ticket sales. As well as having made a cracking album, she also seems like a jolly nice and down-to-earth person…the kind that actually takes the time to get around to responding to any messages you leave her on MySpace and who keeps a canny blog to boot. It still doesn't change the fact that I don't own a Hag t-shirt though (she has a thing for collecting Merle Haggard t-shirts)…I wonder if turning up in a Dolly one will do?

Polly Paulusma is on at the Academy (for the princely sum of a fiver!) this Thursday if anyone fancies it? I missed her at the Cluny recently...I've also now missed seeing Josh Pyke twice, just because no-one was able to / wanted to go with me...and I'm generally a bit too scaredy to brave gigs on my own!

Blimey...I'm just checking out what I had already written of this blog and it was truly yonks ago that I started it! I was, I think, about to write about a programme that was on "last night" as I was going to sleep...that was actually several weeks ago now! The world seems to be whizzing past me at the moment...mostly as I sleep! This whole being back at work thing has kind of knocked me for six and it doesn't really seem to be leaving the space or time for anything else. I have weeks and weeks worth of Facebook messages I haven't yet replied to, just because I don't have the energy. People must think that I am so rude!

Anyway, the programme that I was going to talk about was that music show on Channel 4 that's hosted by Lauren Laverne and that Welsh boy off T4. And I was busying myself trying to get to sleep (which really hasn't been a problem more recently...busying myself trying not to fall asleep has been far more taxing), but then 'came round' to see Yoko Ono, Beth Ditto (she has such a darling accent when she speaks) and Ana Matronic (grrr!) all sitting on a sofa together...it all felt very surreal. Oh and Bat For Lashes were playing on the same show. I was getting slightly worried about the rate at which Ditto seems to be putting on weight (hoping that it wasn't just to make a point to the media...and rapid weight loss is also something I would comment on if there was someone worth commenting on...Paris Hilton (throw away the key next time!)/ Lindsay Lohan / Nicole Ritchie I couldn't care less...really, what do they add to society? Particularly those 'Simple Life' girls...simple indeedy!) until I saw her naked cover photo for the NME (the first time I have bought it in...I dunno, 13 / 14 years). She looks fab! Bring it on chick.

I always go to sleep with the telly on...I'm really not so good with the whole silence schtick (you don't say?). Either the old brain starts working overtime, or I get scared because I start thinking I can hear noises like my house is being broken into or something (if only those burgling scum realised...or gave a shit...the impact they have on people's lives). So, that particular night, after said Ditto programme, I next stirred to find, there on my screen, a talking panda. Now I really wasn't sure if I was just dreaming or not, or even hallucinating from lack of sleep! But that was nothing compared to the next time I opened my eyes. By that point, said talking panda was being, erm...let's say manually pleasured, by some zookeeper man. WTF?

At this stage, having disclosed the above, I feel I need some nice cosy sanctuary...so let's have a bit of a chat about Neighbours eh? It's totally crazy lately...on the occasions I have caught it, Karl and Susan have been holidaying (is that how you spell it?) in London, where they have bumped into Emma Bunton and Parky, and been re-married by Neil Morrissey, with Sinitta present as a witness! Way to boost a flagging career...bit-part in Neighbours! Ahem.

But, alas, the little cosy retreat of tea time BBC1 has also been threatened recently. Nope, I'm not talking about the fact that the Beeb have decided not to bother re-purchasing it...I am talking about the fact that they have killed off the Stinger!! That's spiggin' dreadful that is...Scotty, I will mourn you forever :o(

And I think, for now, we should leave this here...in loving memory of Stingray (de de ler de der de).

Oh, except for one final ponderance...

Is it just me, or do some of those "Dulux - We know the colours that go" colours really not go?

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