I have just found out about openoffice.org...wow! I have done without having Microsoft Word on my computer for so long...I didn't know it could be so easy! This is exactly the same...and free (and where I typed this blog)!
So...onto what I am really here to write about. And that is marriage.
I am sick of it.
One of my good friends is getting married in two weeks time (the hen 'do' was this weekend, but I am too skint to go to both, so missed out, unfortunately. And I'm not sure my car's well enough to get me down to Southampton for the wedding...it's making some very funny noises...hmmm). Another, in the same group of friends, got married last August, and another texted me yesterday to say she got engaged this week.
Is it something about being 27? A load of school peeps I have recently caught up with on Facebook are getting married this year as well.
And here's me, continually flying solo...I haven't had a proper relationship in about 6 years! Is it just easier for straight people to pair off? Am I too picky? Am I too shy about meeting people? Or are they just (collectively) starting to panic? They are all a lot more worried about this whole ageing business than I seem to be. Hmmm.
Whilst I am happy for all of these friends, it just brings home to me that I am likely to end up a lonely old spinster who goes through life without companionship! Even just some mindless fucking now and then might be nice! If they have all already found the one, how come it's been so long since I've even found a one??
Ok, so, admittedly lesbians are a hard bunch to fancy...my choices are much more limited than a straight person's I guess...and the pool I have to choose from generally doesn't seem worth bothering with!
But I am beginning to wonder if it is just me, when everyone else is finding somebody significant! Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that I just don't come into contact with many gay women. If it was men I was after, well I'm in contact with straight men every day, so there would be more opportunities...it's just that I really don't fancy having to settle for a willy in my life!
And so, as time moves on, I am becoming the only one who doesn't have a 'plus one' on their invitation, the only one who turns up alone and is the singleton in the group. The old maid of an auntie in the corner! And that's not much fun...ok, it's alright for now, at this age, and with friends I'm comfortable with and have known a long time, but it's going to wear thin eventually, eh?
I don't single myself out for being gay...it's just one facet of who I am. Who I sleep with (or not, as the case seems to be!) has little bearing on other things. But it is singling (ha ha) me out without me wanting it to!
Even if I was straight, I am not one to tow the line...I don't personally believe in marriage...and don't get me started on civil ceremonies...baloney!
Ok, rant over for now I guess. One last thing (and, as per my usual form, completely unrelated)...why, in the supermarket, can you not buy caramelised cashew nuts? Why do they have to come hand-in-hand with peanuts? I'm not a fan of peanuts, and it seems silly to buy a packet only to eat the cashews and then throw the rest away. Even they have paired up on me!
Hang on...perhaps this is linked. Perhaps the Miss Right out there is the one who wants the peanuts and not the cashews??